TWO MORE PAGES THIS WEEK from the folks at The Greer Citizen. Publisher Don Wilder says the first drew some pushback from readers but he said the page supported a good cause so he was OK with that. Ed’s comments follow it…and the second submission.
Overall, I like the page a lot. A few nits:
1. Tighter kerning needed between the cap “T”s and the following “A”s in the headline. This just pops off the page at me.
2. Not so sure about the pink screen. I understand why it’s there…but don’t think I would have done that.
3. Subhead leaves me flat…and doesn’t tell me very much.
Good organization of the photos and the vertical pic at left gives the page added visual interest.
1. Too much type in the top right and bottom left. Perhaps placing the dollar tag halfway down the right column in the top story would have helped. Also, move the pullout into the center leg in the bottom story.
2. Type next to dollar tag in the top story is v e r y s p a c e d and needs to be fixed. If I were judging this page for a contest, that alone would bring immediate rejection. It’s unprofessional and it makes us look sloppy when we let it go.
3. Good idea on the lead art but it’s just too small to have enough impact. Perhaps you could have played the art in the “Smiles” package smaller to make more room for the lead art to grow.
So…those are Ed’s points. How about the rest of you? Jump in!